How to Manage Emotional Food Cravings Along Your Path to Making Peace with Food

We all have food cravings. You know, that feeling where you just want something sweet, or salty or crunchy, or maybe all three in one! But why do we have these cravings and what can we do about them? Occasional food cravings are normal, however if you struggle with emotional eating, the cravings may be emotionally driven. It is vital to become emotionally aware in order to differentiate what type of craving your are experiencing. This will allow you to make a conscious choice in the moment of a craving. 

A general food craving is a message from your body. It may be trying to send you the message that you are dehydrated, that you have a nutritional deficiency, or that your energy dip may be related to a blood sugar imbalance. These are all really useful messages that are important to notice. When you truly listen to your body, you receive and understand these messages with clarity. A general food craving may also indicate that your daily diet is boring, uninspired, dull in flavor and lacking in a wide range of nutrients. The good news is, you can do something about all of this!

An emotional craving is different. An emotional craving is due to experiencing an emotion and not wanting to be present with it. There is a big difference. If you are experiencing a general food craving, you might be satisfied by having a small amount of what you are craving or a healthier version of what you are craving. With an emotional craving, this is often not the case as the food serves to numb the emotion only temporarily.

An emotional craving is far more difficult to manage and can lead to mindless overeating, weight gain and negative feelings about yourself and your body. The challenge is to begin to allow yourself to experience your emotions and have an alternative behavior aside from eating in order to manage your emotions.

When emotional eating has become deeply engrained as a behavior and your primary go-to coping skill to manage your emotions, it can take a long time to effectively manage and change it. If emotional cravings that lead to emotional eating do not become managed, it can lead to eating disorders, depression, anxiety and a low self-esteem.

Here are some examples of common emotional cravings:

• When you are feeling lonely, food will be your friend and keep you company.

• When you are feeling anxious, food helps to calm you down and temporarily occupy your mind.

• When you are feeling sad, food becomes your comfort.

• When you are feeling bored, food gives you something to do with your time.

• When you are feeling down, food becomes your pleasure.

One strategy to begin to understand what may be driving your food cravings is keeping an emotional cravings journal. This is a place to write down, acknowledge and process your emotions in order to more deeply understand the why underneath and at the root of your craving. Another strategy is having a supportive person to talk to. This may be someone you trust, or someone such as a therapist or health coach to provide support as you work through your emotional cravings. Learning to manage, accept and experience your emotions will help you heal your relationship with food.

As a Wholistic Food Therapist, my focus is working with women who struggle with emotional eating. I have put together a 3-Step Emotional Cravings Protocol that helps to stop the cycle of deeply rooted emotional eating patterns. If you would like a FREE copy, sign up for my newsletter on my website so you can begin managing your emotional food cravings today.

Making peace with food is possible. If you find you would like more support along your path to healing, contact me as I have a number of ways to help support you along your journey to a healthy relationship with food as well as with yourself.

5 Body Positive Mantras You Need Now (And How to Use Them!)

When working alongside women who struggle with emotional eating, I am able to witness their renewed commitment to themselves as they create a healthy mindset. They work hard for months and months to change old, self-defeating behaviors with new, self-care focused behaviors. They challenge themselves to shift their perspective around food and emotions in order to develop a deeper connection to themselves through awareness. This is tremendously powerful work! After all of this positive and healthy change, there is a lingering challenge that seems to plague most women (and most likely men). This lingering challenge is how they feel about their body---it is never good enough.

Why is it that we struggle to be content with our bodies? Why can’t we appreciate all of the amazing things our bodies can do? As women, we spend time complaining about our various body parts and feel that some distorted perception of “perfection” would somehow create happiness. Thoughts such as, if I had this-- or-- if I didn't have that, then I could be happy with my body-- seem to plague our minds. There are all of these conditions we place on our ability to be satisfied with our bodies. However, this is simply not true!

Happiness originates from aligning with what is true right NOW. Happiness is not a place to get to later, not before when things may have been different, but an experience of accepting what you have right NOW. Being body positive means being grateful for and content with your body as it is right NOW.

So how do we work to heal this long-standing negative perception of our bodies? How do we shift from disdain and disgust to appreciation, acceptance and gratitude for the body we have right NOW? With practice! So, what do we practice? We practice appreciation, acceptance and gratitude for our bodies in the here and the NOW.

So, you may be wondering what exactly is a mantra and what does it have to do with healing a negative body image? The word mantra means instrument of the mind. A mantra is a powerful tool used to center yourself in order to create a single pointed focus of the mind. When you first begin the practice of using a body positive mantra, your mind will try to argue with the mantra, to disregard it. Your mind will say things like, that’s wrong-- or-- that’s a lie. Your mind will inevitably wander to other random thoughts. This is why we have to practice!

When your mind wanders, try not to get caught into the story and roller coaster of your thoughts. Judging thoughts will be there and are a result of mental conditioning that has been created over the many years you have been struggling with a negative body image. All of the negative stories you have been telling yourself, negative stories you have been hearing from media influences and other people have become deeply engrained.

Remind yourself that this is a challenging process to shift from a negative body image to a more grounded, grateful and positive body image. It will become more comfortable with time and consistent practice. Again, each time your mind wanders, return your focus to your mantra. So, if your mind wanders 100 times, return to your mantra 101 times!

Try this challenge: for the next month, use one or more of the following body positive, self-love mantras. Spend 5 minutes repeating the mantra silently within your mind. After 5 minutes, spend 5-10 minutes journaling to reflect on your experience and how you feel. This time for reflection and journaling is a helpful because with practice, you will begin to notice a positive shift internally. Mantras are a powerful source of transformation that will be evident and reflected back to you through your reflective journaling process. So now, here they are!

5 Body Positive Mantras

1.    In this moment, I accept my body unconditionally.

2.    I am grateful for my body and all that it can do.

3.    I am just right, just as I am.

4.    I am beautiful, inside and out.

5.    I love myself, wholly and completely.

When you embark on this body positive, self-love mantra adventure, you will begin to heal your relationship with your body and in turn with yourself. You will grow in your self-confidence and find a deeper level of appreciation, acceptance, and gratitude for your body as well as for yourself. Most importantly, you will feel this growth from within, the only place that really matters.

One of the best ways to maintain your focus is to reach out and encourage others to practice with you! Who can you inspire to heal their relationship with their body? I’d love to hear how your month-long body positive mantra adventure goes for you, so please, keep in touch!

EMDR Therapy Demystified

EMDR is an extremely powerful and effective integrative therapy that uses a specific protocol to reduce emotional and physical distress. The distress may be related to memories, adverse life experiences or traumas that have occurred at any time throughout your life. EMDR allows the opportunity for healing at the deepest roots and helps to increase self-awareness while offering a renewed perspective on the present moment.

Since I began integrating EMDR into my clinical practice, it has transformed my work. I have been especially inspired by the power of EMDR when a person feels a deeper sense of emotional freedom and increased self-acceptance both internally and externally. This authentic self-acceptance and awareness creates a deeper connection to the core of their being as well as a sense of balance and peace within. The process allows you to not only heal, but to grow, change and feel better than imagined.

I can personally attest to the power of EMDR from both sides of the couch. After completing my first EMDR intensive training, I searched for an EMDR therapist as I was amazed by the process. Prior to EMDR therapy, I had debilitating performance anxiety. I realized through the training that I was operating out of old, stuck, negative cognitions and feedback loops in my brain that were related to my past, and were literally holding me back in my life.

I am now able to give presentations without physically shaking, a racing heart, a red face, nausea, intense fear and a near panic attack. It really has been life changing. For those I have had the privilege to support through the EMDR therapy process, I have been able to witness healing over and over again, which is truly inspiring.

EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. EMDR was developed by Francine Shapiro in 1987 and is administered through an eight-phase process. Here is where it can get technical, making it a little tricky to explain, but I wanted to help to clarify some elements of EMDR therapy as so many people ask me what it’s like during certain parts of the process.

The eye movements create bilateral stimulation of the brain. You work with a specific distressing memory, body sensations and emotions that the memory brings up for you and how the memory makes you feel about yourself. These experiences from the memories may have made you feel, for example, not good enough, like you had to be perfect, or as though you are not in control. These are all examples of negative cognitions which essentially get stuck and create negative feedback loops internally, making it difficult to move forward.

The bilateral stimulation that occurs with the eye movements begins to reprocess those memories in order to desensitize to them. This essentially frees the emotional and physical distress related to the memory. After working through the distressing memories, a positive cognition is installed, creating a healthier outlook on your experience.

I will try to explain this using an example of when I reprocessed a memory related to my performance anxiety. While I was thinking of a distressing memory, I tuned into the uncomfortable emotions it brought up (embarrassed, worried, frustrated) and the uncomfortable body sensations (feeling hot, my heart racing, nausea). I simultaneously brought up how this made me feel about myself, or my negative cognition, which was: I am inadequate. The therapist asked me how distressing this felt on a 0-10 scale.

While sitting with all of that discomfort, I watched the therapist’s fingers go back and forth for about 30 seconds. She asked me to just notice whatever comes up during that time. She would stop, and I would tell her what came up. Then she instructed me to “go with that,” meaning now focus on whatever it was that came up for me. For example, I remembered my hands shaking, my mind going blank and the look on the people’s faces at the very beginning of this particular presentation. While sitting with that experience, she administered the eye movements again. This was repeated several times.

Amazingly, after about ten sets of intense discomfort, I started to feel less discomfort. I even had some positive thoughts come up and felt more at ease. When I would focus on the positive thoughts, more positive thoughts and feelings arose. While my distress did not completely go away in one experience, it did reduce enough to notice an immediate impact.

After several memories that reinforced my negative cognition were worked through, I was able to create a new template for how I view myself. This has increased my self-compassion. Now when I give a presentation, my old baggage from those memories does not show up! It really has been life changing.

This is one example of just a part of the EMDR therapy process. I wanted to offer this glimpse into the process as it can be difficult to understand, but know that there is so much more. If you would like to learn more about the technicality, the science, research and more specifically about the eight phases of EMDR, I invite you visit the website: www.EMDRIA.org.

EMDR therapy has improved the lives of so many who have struggled with memories and experiences far more intense and challenging to cope with than my example. For those who have PTSD, panic attacks, anxiety, depression, eating disorders or anyone who feels as though they are operating out of old, stuck negative beliefs about themselves, EMDR may be a useful and valuable therapeutic technique.

If you are considering EMDR therapy and have any further questions at all, or if you are in the New York City area and would like to schedule a session, feel free to contact me today.