Decoding Food Cravings

Managing food cravings can be one of the most challenging aspects of healing from emotional eating. Food cravings can occur for any number of reasons, some are more generalized and have little if not nothing to do with your internal emotional world. However, some food cravings are solely driven by emotions. Learning how to understand the difference between a general food craving and an emotional craving can make all the difference in healing your relationship with food.

What is a general food craving? 

There are several reasons a more general food craving may occur. One reason being that the craving is sending you a message from your body about what it may need. A general food craving can signal that your body’s nutrients are out of balance. This could look and feel like having a strong craving for a particular food, and yet you have absolutely no idea why. It could be that your iron levels are out of balance or electrolytes are out of balance, and therefore your body is craving a food that will replenish that particular nutrient.

Another reason a general food craving can occur is as a signal that you are dehydrated. You might be craving a particular food, or possibly a very hydrating type of food, and yet you may not be hungry. This can be addressed by drinking water when you first notice a food craving and then seeing if it helps it subside.

Another common cause of general food cravings is that your blood sugar is too high or too low. Blood sugar imbalances can wreck havoc on your system as a whole. For many people, this can be remedied by eating regularly, and especially by pairing protein with fiber to help balance blood sugar levels. Having a leafy green vegetable at the start of your meal can help to mitigate a blood sugar spike, as can taking a tablespoon of apple cider vinegar diluted in 3-6 ounces of water prior to a meal. If you are concerned about your blood sugar, you can talk with your doctor about testing and continuous glucose monitoring.

One big trigger for general food cravings is that they can be a sign that your diet is too repetitive or boring. If you are having the same foods day in and day out for your meals or snacks, and you find that you are craving other foods, then you might want to switch up your meals more frequently. Having variety in your dietary intake can be a more satisfying way of eating. If you are bored with your food, your cravings may be signaling that you need more flavors, more joy, and more variation in your food choices. This will help create greater satisfaction and satiation which helps to reduce food cravings.

Another big trigger for general food cravings can be restricting yourself to certain foods. Even if you are feeling satiated and you are receiving adequate caloric intake, if you have off-limits foods (for a reason other than an allergy/intolerance/physical discomfort caused by the food), then your mind may be rebelling by craving those very foods because it is feeling controlled. Opening up your food options, practicing nonjudgment and mindful eating with your food choices can help reduce this type of food craving.

The last general food craving I’ll mention here is that cravings can be triggered by your senses. If you just saw an ad for a particular food, or heard someone talking about a particular food or even smelling a particular food you might not be able to shake the craving. Your senses are very powerful, and when you have a craving due to seeing, smelling, or hearing about a particular food, that is a general craving. Sometimes you also may just have a “taste” for something for no specific reason, but yet it is not an emotionally driven craving or desire for the food. 

What is an emotional food craving?

Emotional food cravings are very different than general food cravings in that the driving force behind the craving is emotional. Most likely the emotion you are experiencing is uncomfortable and triggers a desire to numb out, avoid, or distract from the discomfort. This becomes cyclical and can act like an override to your system. When you experience that emotion, your system automatically compensates by creating the food craving. Giving in to emotional food cravings can cause a myriad of even further side effects. These side effects may include a lack of emotional awareness, possible unwanted weight gain, hopelessness, anxiety, and frustration. It often feels out of control and can create cycles of further emotional distress such as guilt and shame.

Another type of emotional food craving can be more subtle. These cravings represents something that may be lacking or subtly showing up emotionally in your life. For example, if you are craving sugar, you may be lacking sweetness in your life and you may benefit from more connection with yourself and others. If you are craving something salty, that may indicate that you are more stressed or anxious and need more grounding and peacefulness through relaxation, mindfulness, or other soothing activities. Cravings for something crunchy can indicate feeling emotions such as anger, frustration, stress, or boredom. This may be better served finding an outlet that increases mental and physical stimulation and movement in your life.

How can I cope with these food cravings?

Coping with food cravings is something that I support people with in my practice all the time. Food cravings are common, and yet many people feel alone in their struggles. I have a three-step cravings protocol that I recommend that many people find to help manage their food cravings far more effectively. It can be implemented in real time if you are fully aware of the craving; however, it can also be practiced in retrospect, which allows more opportunity to feel empowered as you grow and strengthen your self-awareness and emotional-awareness muscles!

The first step is to pause. During this pause, you might take some slow, deep breaths. You might set a timer for five minutes and make a plan to not eat during that time. You might have a glass of water. This pause is essential because it will help you to create more space between the trigger and your ability to respond to the trigger with more intention. 

Step two is to reflect. I recommend the BLAST method. Ask yourself, “Am I Bored, Lonely, Angry, Stressed or Sad, or Tired?” These are some of the most common emotions that trigger emotional eating for many people. While the internal emotional landscape is far more nuanced and there are so many emotions you may be experiencing, this can be a great place to start—you can always dig deeper when needed. During this reflection phase, you are learning to create space and explore with the desire to have greater self-awareness and emotional acceptance. 

The third step is to release. After pausing and reflecting, if you determine that it is NOT an emotional craving and you are actually hungry, eat what you are craving in a mindful, intentional, and peaceful way. Be truly present with your food, enjoy the taste, and the process of eating. Eat slowly and savor in the flavor and the experience of actually enjoying eating this food. Check in with your body when you are done; consider, How does this food make me feel? Learn from these messages that your body provides you based on full sensations, energy levels, digestion, satiety, and any residual cravings. This creates greater self-awareness, self-empowerment, and connection to your body. This process improves your relationship with food, your body, and yourself. 

If you find it IS an emotional craving, the release process could look like taking time to journal about the emotion you are experiencing, and spending some time trying to understand the message that the uncomfortable emotion or feeling state is trying to communicate with you. Other ways you can practice the release may be talking to someone to share your emotions or practicing deep breathing, mindfulness, meditation, or movement to release the emotion mentally and physically. You can also try using one of the following self-affirming statements: “I am capable of handling my emotions.” “I can make a different choice.” “I am learning to listen to messages from my body.” 

However you choose to release the craving, be it a general or emotional food craving, you create more present moment awareness to become more conscious and empowered. You are developing and growing your self-awareness, which is what all growth requires and where it always begins. You will also become more connected to your inner emotional world and understand your unique needs. The more you practice the three steps - pause, reflect, and release - the more you will create opportunities to connect to your mind and body in a more peaceful, balanced, and connected way.

EMDR Therapy + Manifestation

The concept of manifestation is not new, however, the way it is practiced has changed significantly over the years. Information about the brain, consciousness, imagery, and self-worth, continues to be studied and researched, and there is great evidence to the science of manifestation. So much evidence has been offered to understand more logically how and why it actually works.

I remember hearing on the Oprah show years ago, and it struck me in a big way, “you don’t become what you want in life, you become what you believe.” This is the foundation of manifestation, and why some of the concepts that popularized it, and made it seem a little out-there of just picture it and it will happen, have not proven to be how or why manifestation actually works. What you are unconsciously creating in your life, is created directly out of your level of self-worth. If you believe you are not good enough, destined to fail, are unworthy, inadequate, unloveable, or even always in danger, then no matter how much you want something, most likely you will find yourself in patterns of subconsciously sabotaging any efforts to create it in your life.

This is where EMDR therapy can be a very powerful and useful technique to integrate with your manifestation, or self-worth improvement process. EMDR therapy (if you want to learn more about EMDR therapy, you can read previous blog posts HERE, HERE and HERE) works to reprocess the memories, experiences, and feeling states that have created or reinforced the negative internalized beliefs that hold you back from living your best life. These negative beliefs create unconscious blocks to moving forward in your life. I know this to be true from both as a certified EMDR therapist, as well as a client receiving EMDR therapy. I have experienced how it helped me unravel more than one negative cognition, or negative internalized limiting belief, which has allowed me to take more intentional and subconscious action towards what I want. EMDR therapy has helped me embody how it feels to be worthy of what I want.

If you are familiar with some of the concepts of manifestation and cast it off as woo-woo, I totally get it. However, there are more and more studies and books out there explaining the brain-based science of how it actually works. I have been doing the work of To Be Magnetic (interested? try it out here with a coupon code here: TBM) for a few years and have seen it work really well with EMDR therapy. The process is logical and there in no woo-woo belief required. What I like about TBM specifically is that she has partnered with a neuroscientist and an EMDR therapist to create the process, which is a wonderful compliment to EMDR therapy, or any therapeutic technique.

Once doing the manifestation work (or any self-development work) many find that they discover that they have one or more blocks related to self-worth. Working through these blocks with an EMDR (or any) therapist can not only speed up the work of manifesting (creating the life you desire) or feeling more grounded in your sense of self, but also create more ease, self-awareness, emotional tolerance, and overall improve your mental wellbeing on many levels. 

When you create a vision for what you want and know why you want what you want, you set in motion opportunities for your brain to subconsciously seek it out. When you incorporate how it will feel to have what you want, and align it with your personal values, the why you actually want it, and then practice being in that desired feeling state, you again, set in motion opportunities for your brain to subconsciously seek it out. When practiced repeatedly while simultaneously clearing out the past memories, traumas, and experiences that created the blocks in the first place, you open yourself up to living in alignment with your new internalized beliefs, such as: I am worthy, I am lovable, I am good enough, I deserve what I want, In this moment I am safe, I’m ok…

Curious about integrating EMDR therapy with other types of self-worth development work? Feel free to reach out and schedule a complimentary consultation. You are capable of creating the life you want, the life you desire. You deserve to feel worthy of what you want and to do the work to support your mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual wellbeing.

Emotional Eating, it's Not About the Food

When your mind is constantly preoccupied with food, weight, and your body, it may be difficult to recognize that your struggles are really not about food at all. Most people who struggle with emotional eating have a deeper understanding of food in relation to studies, diets, and health than they’d care to share. When we can explore our food history to begin to see where our patterns were first picked up, we can more clearly see how it’s not information we are lacking. Rather, we want to explore how it came to be that food became the most accessible coping tool for emotional pain, which is about emotional avoidance and really has nothing to do with the food itself. 

If you have been stuck in yo-yo dieting struggles for much many years, gaining and losing the same X amount of weight over and over again, it feels like “it must be me, I must be the problem.” However, the awareness that it is actually NOT about the food can be difficult to wrap your head around because food and body thoughts constantly preoccupy your mind. When this awareness, it’s not about the food, can be fully internalized, it can begin to set free the feelings of failure and shame that a yo-yo dieting history can create. Diet culture has instilled the belief that a diet can save us, that it IS about the food, that a diet can solve all of our body-image struggles and give us confidence and happiness. We now have a lot of research and data that shows quite the opposite, that diets actually have a nearly 96% failure rate, and yet they make the dieter feel as though it’s their fault. The culture is changing, however, it’s slow as these beliefs are deeply embedded and extremely pervasive.

Most people have a food story. A story that begins with their body being up for discussion from a very young age. One that begins with being put on a diet very early in their life. One that begins with not being allowed to eat things their siblings were allowed to because of their body size. One that begins with food being offered as the only sign they received from care givers of being loved or cared for. One that begins with food being an escape from loneliness, isolation, fear, and pain. One where they were told to ignore their hunger/full cues in order to clean their plates, or due to guilt of hungry children in other countries. One where access to food was scarce and inconsistent. One where food was a punishment. One where a parent actively restricted their food, commented on their own and other people’s bodies with constant judgement. No matter what your food story is about, the middle, the place where we can recognize that it’s not about the food, is where there is an opportunity to seize the moment and develop a deeper self-awareness. When we can fully understand that it’s not about the food, then we are free to explore, then what is it actually about?

Writing out your food story can be deeply healing and meaningful. In both my online course and workbook, I offer guidance to go through this process as an exercise as it’s an essential component in the process of healing your relationship with food. Ideally we all want food to be just food. We all want food to be something we eat for nourishment, pleasure, connection, and to feel good. We want to stop the food noise, body checking, and just feel good. If you have a complicated relationship with food, or one where food is both a problem for you as well as the solution to your problem, we have to interrupt the cycle and begin to create openings for the relationship and patterns to change. With any relationship, there needs to be awareness, honesty, shared experience, and open, respectful communication. In order to heal and transform our relationship with food, as well as with ourselves, we have to unlearn the old beliefs, stories, and fear of food and our bodies from the toxicity of the past to one of mutual respect and care.

When you examine the past, it’s not about drudging up pain and suffering, or pointing fingers and blaming, it’s about awareness. When we have a deeper understanding of how and why our relationship to food has become one of struggle, shame, and even contempt, we can begin to unravel, understand and hold the past with curiosity and compassion. When we start with awareness we can begin to develop a roadmap for ourselves to what we want from where we’ve been. When you know it’s not about the food, you know that there is no diet, wellness plan, or workout that will make you satisfied with food or your body. When you know it’s not about the food you can take a deep dive and excavate the roots of the emotions, the hurt, the struggles, and the external noise that became internal dialogue. When you know it’s not about the food, you can clearly see that healing is possible by walking through the wounds of the past, and into the hopeful space of the vision you can create for yourself. 

When time allows, spend some time writing out your food story and examine your own history. Then take anything that feels harmful, toxic, and just untrue, and begin to rewrite your story, write out your desires for your new, more loving, inclusive, and compassionate story going forward from today.